Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize