we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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