im drinking this country out of the recession.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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