My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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