You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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