She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize