Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
You dont lie about slip and slides
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
