Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
