If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
This toilet bowl is my home.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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