i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
