Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
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