marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
