I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Drake has all the answers
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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