i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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