Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
