you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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