The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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