Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
