I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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