Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
