just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
