so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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