i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
