yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
