My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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