I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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