And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Randomize