so explain again why im purple
no
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
