Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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