I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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