i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
