I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
