And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
