I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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