fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
