hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
