I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Randomize
