If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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