Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
