What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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