Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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