Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
He kissed a someone with a penis
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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