he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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