Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
look no pants
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
