my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
