how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
