Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
