We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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