No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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