Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
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I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
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There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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